How simple.

Right now, my daughter is reading (!) a book to her brother. He is following along loudly, yelling the words a second after she does into a paper towel tube. Then he says, "Bee-da, 'nor boook?" It is so sweet. It's actually quiet for a second, and I am considering coffee for the first time this morning. Lucien slept in my bed last night, so I didn't get much sleep as his favorite part of sleeping with mama is kicking me in the face every hour or so. I didn't have the energy last night to make him sleep in his own bed.

Today is the 6 year anniversary of my grandmother's death. I feel weird about it. I can't believe it was that long ago already, but I counted and I was 16 at the time, so it must be true. So much is different, and I wish she knew *I* am different, too. I for sure wasn't much to be proud of at 16.

It's very surreal. I'm not very good at handling things like this anymore... I'm actually not good at handling anything very well anymore, since then, probably. I've gotten a harder exterior, but my insides have been mush since 6 years ago, today. You would think time would make things easier. It hasn't, not really.

On a different (and quite a bit less depressing) note, I think we might be going to see the new Fantastic 4 movie tonight. Brenda wants to see it really bad, and Tim generally wants to see that type of movie... I'm not as excited, but I think it's cool that Brenda likes something so much that's not princesses or frills or squishy bunnies. She needs to develop her tomboyish side a little more, in my opinion... her girly side is fully developed and flourishing. Besides, how else is she going to survive in a house with two little brothers?

That being said.. I don't wanna go. I want to soak in a bubble bath, do my nails, and maybe sew/crochet a bit. Some tomboy-role model I am, huh? And along those lines... I wonder what 15 year old me would think of me now. She'd probably shake her head at me pitifully and demand I make some food. She'd try to talk me into believing that motherhood, and being a stay-at-home-mom, is a rediculous waste of time you could be free to do whatever makes you awesome. I think I'm pretty awesome, and I'd be kind of scared to know what she thinks is a good time, anymore. So. There's that.

And I must go now, as Luke has seemed to have knocked one of Brenda's front teeth loose. There's no crying or blood, but holy crap, it's way too early for her to be getting loose teeth.